Wearing Lingerie for a Little Date Night Spice

Rya Collection Chemise in Black.JPG

Wearing: Chantilly Chemise in Black from Rya Collection (size medium)

Growth, what a beautiful thing, huh?  

When I first launched The Lace Appeal,  I all gung-ho that there would be no talk relating to lingerie and sex.  Zip.  Zero.  Nada.  Like, if someone even brushed on the topic, I would roll my eyes so hard, and mentally excuse myself from the conversation.  Because for some reason this topic would literally make my skin crawl.  

Now I know that sounds like an exaggeration.  Okay, it definitely is an overreaction.  But I wanted to create a space where women could start a conversation on the topic outside of men.  

Is that so bad?  Like, can we just have a moment to discuss our panties without men chiming in on our looks?  How about we have the chance to decide for ourselves.  Because as I recall, they're not the ones wearing the garments.  

(Please note that I am using the gender I associate with along with my sexual preference as an example.  This does not mean I believe only women should wear lingerie.  If it makes you feel YOUR VERY BEST, I support that.  I will work on developing gender-neutral and inclusive words).  

However, through my research and exploration of the blog.  I've remembered that women are also sexual beings too.  I began to wonder if it might be unhealthy and extreme to ignore this topic.  Maybe start a conversation that it's okay to explore different sides to your sexuality. How you would like to present yourself during a sexual experience.  I find most brands market with the "sex sells" concept.  However, it's through the lens of the male perspective. 

Plus, we all now that I a big into my undies being versatile.  If you can't find three reasons, or occasions, to wear the piece.  It probably means you shouldn't buy it.  It's not worth letting your new find collect dust in your closet, with no hopes of seeing the day of light.

So, I guess this brings us to the big question.  How does a gal find sexy, versatile, date night lingerie?  

1.  Personality and Style 

Ask yourself, who are you?  Maybe you're the conservative dresser at work, but love a little latex and harness play outside of the workforce.  Or perhaps you prefer an item that's still feminine with a bit more coverage.  Like, a silky chemise?  Either way, explore who you are and don't be afraid to try everything out.  There is NO right or wrong answer here.  Just as long as you are wearing something that makes you feel your absolute best.  Sans judgment.  

Side note: Women can be cady and judgmental when it comes to this topic.  It's important to remember that we all have different ideas of what's sexy, boring and inappropriate.  But the bottom line here is, just because YOU don't understand someone else's views.  Does not make those views untrue. 

2.  Put Your Partners Needs Aside 

Now, I am not saying do this every single time.  But sometimes a girl has to be a little selfish and take control of the situation.  Maybe your partner loves seeing you in a red babydoll, but you feel super confident in a white bodysuit?  Again, this time it's about you.   

3.  Confidence 

Is not only the key to life, but it's also the hottest thing any human being can wear.  Plain and simple.  You could wear a garbage bag, wear it with pride, and look like the hottest thing since sliced bread.  Own it.  

Now, with all of this info locate your local lingerie boutique and go shopping.  Be sure to explain the articulate your answers above and enjoy the process.  It truly is a fun and empowering experience.  

Melissa Cherniss